Diet and Health Articels

How many arguments do parents have when one or the other arrives late from work? How many times have you heard a partner say, 'I thought this was the one place I could catch a break!' The myth of family is that the home should be a bastion of peace and tranquility. The stresses of life should not walk in the front door and sit down to share the supper table with the wife, kids, parents and in-laws.

Family Stress

Family stress is very much like normal stress in that the stress itself is inevitable. Families, after all, are comprised of individuals who each carry their own stress and difficulties wherever they go. It is how families cope with stress that is important.

In families where both mom and dad are working, their stress is caused more by the separate pressures of their jobs and their roles in their family than by any conflicts that arise from juggling the dual responsibilities. A study done for the American Psychological Association found that both parents derive self-esteem from their accomplishments at work rather than accomplishments at home while their emotional state of happiness or depression is obtained from the relationships they have within their family.

As with the stress of the individual's life, there are some symptoms of family stress:

• Sense of urgency
• Little time to spend together
• Sense of frustration (too much to do)
• Desire for the simpler life
• Never time to relax
• Explosive arguments
• Bickering
• Conversations centered on time and tasks rather than people and feelings
• Meals eaten in haste
• Constant rushing from place to place
• Escaping into work or another activity
• Isolation in room
• Sense of guilt

Coping with Stress

Families who are less stressed seem to find time to enjoy and support each other. They display more flexibility in their schedules, have reasonable expectations and communicate with each other. They view stress as a challenge to be tackled in earnest and as a temporary situation that they will overcome.

A family's capacity for coping and overcoming stress requires a cooperative effort of the various members of the family. The following is a list of simple tips to help family's cope with the challenges that life's stress has to offer.

• Make lists
• Be realistic about time frames
• Let go of the compulsion to do it all
• Accept that there will always be projects in progress
• Re-examine standards for house keeping
• Purchase goods and services that buy time if you can afford it
• Let go of the 'super parent' myth
• Give yourself and others credit for tasks completed (even the little ones)
• Select new commitments carefully
• Say no to the things that aren't important
• Say yes to the things in which your children are directly involved
• Prioritize (do not spread yourself thin)
• Limit time spent on the phone, the computer and other isolating activities.
• Don't be afraid to ask for help

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Families provide the support structure and the emotional backbone of your lifestyle. Balancing the rigors of family stress and personal stress may seem to be a large undertaking. Remembering that stress is inevitable is the first key to coping with the challenges that come your way. Remembering that your family is important and the stresses that are shared are less than the stresses we keep to ourselves is the second.

Newsweek features an interesting article this week that found moms who have kids are not necessarily happier. In fact, it showed that stay at home moms and moms who work have a lot of things in common when it comes to what makes them happy.

According to the list, the top things that made moms happy were:

• Taking a bubble bath alone
• Working out and going on a family holiday tied
• Receiving a massage or a romantic date with a spouse tied
• Playing with the kids or downtime by herself tied
• Sleeping

What was interesting is that both SAHMs and working moms would prefer 30 minutes to themselves than anything else if given the choice. Even odder was that 86% of the SAHMS they polled thought their kids would be happier if they went to work. 86% is a huge number. So I'm curious Moms, what do you think? When you rate your 'happier' moments - not happiest, I'm talking those moments when you relax, feel like yourself and enjoy most on a day to day basis - how would you rate them?

I had to think about it, but here is my top five moments:

1. My morning coffee. I get up very early and the household is asleep. I let the dogs out and I make my tea or my coffee and I just sit and I enjoy this time to myself. In summer time, I love to go outside and listen to the night birds and very early birds calling.

2. Watching my favorite television shows while I'm working out. It's a mixed combination of two things I really enjoy and I get a major kick out of. It's also just me time, time without the work, the kiddo, the dogs or anyone else. I am in the habit of turning off my cell phone during these time periods too.

3. Going bike riding with the kiddo (or any field trip really). I love getting away from the house when it's just the two of us (whether it's me and the kiddo or me and the husband). For some reason, when we're away from home, we can really relax and just enjoy each other's company.

4. Playing family board games. I love these moments, especially this summer with my daughter reading so much. She can really get into the games and enjoy the interactions.

5. Doing my homework. I'm finishing up a Bachelor's Degree in psychology and I adore working on my class stuff. Even when I'm frustrated and working hard, I find that I feel enormous satisfaction when I'm done and those are moments I wouldn't trade for anything.

So tell me Moms, what about you?

Do you remember the scene in One Hundred and One Dalmatians when Pongo comments on how dogs and their owners often look the same? It's a mildly humorous statement, yet it can be accurate. Your dog may be a very accurate reflection of your personal health. If your dog is overweight, chances are he or she isn't getting enough exercise. Does that suggest that maybe you aren't getting enough exercise too?

The average pet owner that walks their dogs regularly is going to cover more ground than those who just hit the gym to work out. Studies suggest that dog owners walk about 650 miles per year - just when taking the dog out for a walk. The average gym member may cover about 450 miles per year on their treadmills. So, a dog owner already goes further, but is that enough?

Stick to It

There's an inherent stick-to-itiveness (yes, I made the word up) that comes from owning a dog. Your dog needs to go for a walk. Most often dogs need at least two walks per day to exercise them as well as to let them use the bathroom. Even if you split the detail with your spouse or other family member, you are 5 times more likely to stick to your daily routine of exercising than you are in going to the gym. Dog owners, according to some studies, return to their resting heart rates faster than their gym counterparts because they are used to the speeding up and slowing down that comes from walking the dog.

For example, when I walk my dog, he's bursting with energy when we first get out of the house and we move at a relatively fast pace. We slow down after the first five minutes or so, but the pace remains brisk for another ten to fifteen minutes. After that, we're walking at a more relaxed pace and by the time we get home, I am back at my resting heart rate without feeling the push of exertion.

Stress Reduction

We love our pets. They reduce our stress, they provide us with great companionship and they give us the ideal exercise partner - the question then becomes why not take advantage of man's (and woman's) best friend?